Below you will find my Query and First 250 words of my YA LGBT Contemporary, WE’RE OKAY. I hope you have as much fun reading it as I did writing it.
QUERY
High school seniors Gabe Brown and Ryan Mitchell are the only ones who walked away from a bus crash that sent twenty students to their deaths. The accident was the largest tragedy the town of Pensilton, Georgia, where apple pies still cool on windowsills, had ever seen.
Six months later, everyone else is ready to move on.
Gabe’s mayoral candidate father expects his son to lead his soccer team to the state championship. Gabe’s girlfriend, who’s also Ryan’s twin sister, is too busy with securing her Yale admission to really take note of Gabe’s changes since the accident. In fact, no one seems to notice. Or they choose not to notice. Except Ryan.
For both boys, their daily covert text conversations become their way of coping with reality. Between their unabashed honesty and vulnerability, Gabe and Ryan find a strange peace. But when Gabe breaks their rules, and visits Ryan in person, feelings that could be chalked up to digital misinterpretations, come to life.
With their senior year drawing to a close, and their paths about to diverge, their world of stolen glances, late-night texts, and brief touches is about to disappear. Only if they’re brave enough—and honest enough—can both boys make their romance a reality. No matter the consequences.
WE’RE OKAY is a 72,000 word YA LGBT contemporary novel that will appeal to fans of Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe and The Spectacular Now.
FIRST 250 WORDS
Gabe Brown had been sitting in the hospital waiting room for nearly an hour. An accident on the freeway had leaked into downtown Pensilton. So, instead of getting signed out from his twelve day stint inside the hospital, he sat.
With his right hand still in a cast, colored purple by a young, persistent girl on his hospital floor, Gabe focused on his own iPhone, typing away with swift and accurate poundings. His left hand rested on the arm rest, drumming his fingers to a song from yesteryear. Any other time, the illusive musical memory would have driven him insane; but his focus was drawn to something else.
That ‘something else’ was the screen that held thousands of texts back and forth from the boy sitting next to him, who’s fingers were less than an inch from his own.
If he had a choice, though he’d never admit it, Gabe would have happily stayed like that forever. That thought dissolved the moment the double doors slid open with a hiss. Instinctively, his fingers stopped moving and pocketed the phone. With a casual rise of his head, Gabe stood and walked towards his family, feet in time with Ryan’s movements.
“I’m okay,” Gabe gruffly said, giving a painful one arm handshake and back clasping to his father. He heard, just barely over Ryan’s mother’s doting, his hospital mate mention he was also fine.
As their families signed them out, Gabe could only think one thing.
Since when did they become liars?
Love your premise! This looks so interesting. Good luck!
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Thank you so much! 🙂
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KOSOKO my story takes place in Georgia too! Hell yeah! Apple pies cooling on the windowsills…LOVE IT! You know, if you’re willing to read spec fic we may or may not have to trade manuscripts someday 😉
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TOTALLY. and I totally am 🙂
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I wanna read this!!!
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Thanks babe 😉 Best of luck!
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Love the premise. Heartwrenching at the part where the meet for the first time and it changes things and they have to work through what to do! Good Luck!
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Thank you so much! Best of luck to you too!
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Gorgeous writing. I was drawn right in. Good luck! 🙂
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thank you so much, Karen! Best of luck to you too!
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Ari and Dante was an amazing book! This one sounds just as amazing from what you’ve posted! LOVE! Good Luck!
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Oh thanks! I’m so humbled! You too!
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Fantastic theme, writing, and query. Best of luck, Kosoko.
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This is so humbling 🙂 thank you for the kind words! Best of luck to you too, Shawn!
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Love the concept and the first page is beautifully written. Good luck.
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Thank you so much! Best of luck to you too!
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Good luck in the competition!
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thanks so much! you too!
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This sounds like a great story, Kosoko! Love your descriptions–(I’m a finger-drummer too.)
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I too drum my fingers haha. And bite my nails!
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Love this premise and the romance sounds so sweet and innocent. Great first page and query! Good luck!
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awww 🙂 Thanks! Yeah its a good balance between sweet, innocent and dark too 😉 Good luck to you too!
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your query is awesome and I enjoyed your 250. Good luck 🙂
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Thanks! I’m glad you enjoyed it! Good luck to you too!
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This sounds really good! Good luck!
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oh gosh! Thank you so much 🙂 you too!
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Way to go yoda! Great premise. Good luck!
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AWWW! you’re making me blush again! Good luck to you too!
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This sounds great! Good luck! 🙂
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Hi, Jen! Thanks 🙂 You too!
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Ooh, I really like this – it sounds fantastic! I want to read more! Good luck 🙂
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Thanks so much Sophie! Its my pride and joy 🙂 Good luck to you too!
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Love the sound of this! Good luck!!! 🙂
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Thanks so much! I’m glad you enjoy it. Good luck to you too!
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Good luck, Kosoko! I’m definitely loving the story so far.
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Thank you so much, you helped! Best of luck to you too!
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Loved your query and 250! We need way more LGBT novels out there. Unrelated but I love your name. Good luck Kosoko!
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Thank you so much, that means a lot 🙂 Good luck to you too!
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Such a great premise and wonderful writing! Best of luck!
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Hi Amber! Thank you so much 🙂 Best of luck to you too ( I’ll check your out tomorrow, too tired tonight).
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This looks polished and great. My heart is in my throat for these boys just from this little bit! Awesome! Best of Luck!
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Oh! Thank you so much 🙂 That means so much. You too!
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This caught me immediately. I have sympathy for the main characters, trapped in a situation where survivors guilt collides with expectations. And all of this is happening within a context of fragile self-discovery, adding a level of poignancy. I love the ambition and the heart. Best of luck!
Connie
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oh, wow! Thank you so much Connie! You completely hit the nail on the head. I love all my comments and the love given to this story, but this was sheerly amazing. Best of luck to you too!
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A lot of great angles on this one! Love the diversity element. Love that there is healing of all sorts happening here. I’m already wondering lots of things about where this story will go. So you hooked me!
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Thank you so so much for the kind words!
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Ooo… this looks like a great premise and start! Best of luck to you!
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Hi, Kosoko. Can I just say I’m shocked–SHOCKED–that no one picked WE’RE OKAY? This was easily my favorite of the LGBT entries, and it was Anna-Marie’s favorite, too. I didn’t end up picking it for personal reasons, but I thought the hook was great and very believable. I can totally see how the only two survivors of a serious accident might develop such a bond.
If you’d like some additional feedback on your query and first page, feel free to e-mail them to kvandolzer(at)gmail(dot)com. I won’t be able to take a look until I get my teammates’ entries squared away (which will probably take a few weeks), but I’d be happy to share a few more thoughts.
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Hi there, Krista!
Thank you so much for this, I totally understand but thanks for the opportunity! I’ll probably hit you up on that offer in a few weeks. I have 1 full and 3-4 partials already about to go out so after the 2 weeks, you’ll be hearing from me.
Unless, i mean, you could swing the teams to each take on a 9th entry 😉
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